Love, Always and Forever Read online

  Ricky ducked behind Jay. “No fair ganging up on me like this.”

  Jay sidestepped him. “Don’t involve me in your family squabbles, kid. I’d suggest getting to work and hoping for the best. But if things do go badly for you, can I have your game collection?”

  When his uncles both cracked up, Ricky flung his hands in the air. “No way, not if you won’t defend me from such abuse.”

  Mikhail ruffled the boy’s hair. “Get to work or I’ll show you what abuse really looks like.”

  Acting much put-upon, Ricky immediately joined Amy at the woodpile. “See what I have to deal with?”

  She patted him on the shoulder. “Well, as the saying goes, what doesn’t kill you only makes you stronger.”

  He rolled his eyes as he reached past her to pick up a board. “Yeah, right. I swear they taught us in my AP History class that child labor had been outlawed in this country.”

  Tino walked by carrying a second nail gun. “As I seem to recall, you were asking your dad for a chance to earn extra money. Something about wanting to buy a car of your own.”

  Ricky perked right up. “Wait. I’m getting paid? With real money and not just pizza?”

  Mikhail was carrying a second load of stuff from the SUV. “Yes, with real money. That was the deal. And, by the way, I’m paying you a flat fee, not an hourly rate. So no dragging out the job just so you can earn a few more bucks. It won’t do you any good, and it will just piss me off.”

  The teenager stumbled back a couple of steps with his hands over his heart. “I’m devastated that you’d even think such a thing. I’d never do that.”

  “Not unless you thought I wouldn’t notice.” Mikhail gave his nephew a narrow-eyed look, but the boy only laughed as he picked up another board and headed off to where Tino stood waiting in Amy’s backyard. Evidently they were going to work on both fences at once.

  Jay stared after the teenager. “You know, I’d really like to think we were never that mouthy when we were his age, but I was worse.”

  Amy carried a board over to him. “My brothers were all just like him, and they turned out okay. You obviously did, too.”

  “There are some that would argue that point, but thank you for that.”

  Where had Mikhail disappeared to this time? Maybe she was imagining things, but it felt like he was avoiding her. She also wanted to know why he’d asked the guys to come help today. After making sure Jay had a ready supply of the boards, she went in search of her elusive neighbor and spotted him coming out of his back door with a cooler.

  She closed the door for him and waited until he set it down. “You didn’t mention anything about Tino and the others coming over today to help.”

  Rather than meet her gaze, he stared over her head toward the back corner of the yard where Tino and his nephew were hard at work. “I found out that Ricky was needing some extra cash. I thought he might jump at the chance to help out.”

  Yeah, right. She’d seen how excited the kid was to be there. He might not mind helping out, but she’d bet her bottom dollar this wasn’t the boy’s first choice of how he wanted to spend the day. Besides, he’d been genuinely surprised to find out he was getting paid.

  “And Jay and Tino? Neither one had anything better to do with their time?”

  He finally looked directly at her, his expression flat. “I wanted to make sure we got the fence done before you bring the puppy home.”

  “We have another week to work on it.”

  By now, Mikhail was shifting from foot to foot as if he was one second away from bolting. It didn’t take long for her to figure out that one plus one added up to two people kissing.

  “Is this because of last night? Are you sorry?” She kept her voice low, but injected enough temper into her words to make sure he’d answer. “And here’s a hint: I’m not talking about the barbecue or peach cobbler.”

  Mikhail took her by the arm and all but dragged her into his house, obviously wanting to make sure they continued this conversation out of hearing of the others. Once they were inside, he stepped back to put some distance between them.

  “I’m not sorry.” He ran his fingers through his hair, clearly frustrated. “Okay, that’s not true.”

  She winced, his words stabbing her straight in the chest. “As I recall, you kissed me first.”

  “I did, and I enjoyed it. I enjoyed each and every one of them.”

  Frustrated with a conversation that was going nowhere fast, Amy put her hands on her hips and glared up at the man she thought had become a friend. “Then what is your problem? It’s not like I’m naïve enough to think a few hot kisses constitute a commitment of some kind. I had a great time last night and thought you did, too.”

  She paced across the width of the kitchen and back. “No, I take that back. I know you did. There was no mistaking some pretty hard evidence at the time, if you catch my drift. Besides, you even said so. So what’s changed since last night and this morning?”

  —

  Well, shit, this wasn’t going at all well. Mikhail glanced toward the door and briefly wondered if he could make it outside before Amy could stop him. And wouldn’t that reek of cowardice? She was already looking at him like the low-life slug he was. That would only add to the problem if for no other reason than Tino and Jay would ask a bunch of questions he didn’t want to answer, especially if she came out of his house looking upset.

  Time for some honest answers, even if that’s the last thing he wanted to give her.

  “I like you, Amy.”

  He paused when she flinched as if his words had struck a blow. “I do. I mean that.”

  “Oh, yeah, sure you do. That’s why you decided you needed a buffer zone out there today. If I hadn’t heard Jay using the nail gun, would you have even come let me know it was time to work on the fence?”

  “Yeah, I would have. I was going to as soon as I got back with the supplies and picked up Tino and Ricky. It’s just that…”

  When he didn’t immediately continue, Amy looked disgusted. “Just spit out whatever it is that you’re not wanting to say, Mikhail. I’d rather hear the truth even if it hurts than wonder what I did that has you so weirded out.”

  Fine. “I already said I like you. That much is true. The problem is that it would be easy to like you a whole lot more.”

  This time she crossed her arms over her chest as she studied him. “And that’s a bad thing?”

  “Maybe it wouldn’t be if I hadn’t just gotten out of the Corps so recently. I’m doing better, but it hasn’t been easy transitioning back to civilian life. Until I get my head on straight, it wouldn’t be fair to get involved with any woman right now, but especially not you.”

  Somehow he’d drifted back into touching distance without even realizing it. He brushed a strand of her hair back from her face. “You’re sweet and funny and so damn beautiful. You deserve better than a messed-up vet fighting to keep his head above water. It’s all I can do to convince my family that I’m okay. I don’t have enough energy left over to act normal all the time.”

  The anger in her eyes was gone, replaced by what looked suspiciously like pity. Damn it, that’s the last thing he wanted from her. “Look, I don’t want you feeling sorry for me, Amy. I just need you to understand that the best I can offer is friendship, especially when I go through another rough patch. Anything beyond that is out of the question.”

  She drew a shuddering breath, obviously struggling to control her own emotions. “Remind me, Mikhail. Just when did I ask you for anything more than that? Because I can tell you that the last thing I want right now is to get my life tangled up with anybody else’s. If you had asked me, I would’ve told you that friendship is all I was ever hoping for.”

  “Why would you settle for that?”

  Her gaze dropped down to stare somewhere south of his chin. “Let’s just say that this is my first time living out on my own. I’m still working on building up my business. I’ve got a new puppy coming. I’ve got a lot of wor
k to do on my house and yard. The list goes on and on. That’s enough for one person to handle, don’t you think?”

  He’d bet his bottom dollar that those were excuses and not the real reason. Interesting that she would choose to lie, but he didn’t call her on it. It wasn’t as if he was ready to spill his guts, either. He used his forefinger to lift her chin, hoping to make eye contact with her again. Stubborn woman that she was, she shifted her eyes to look to the side. Well, if sniper training was good for anything other than the obvious, it taught a man patience. Finally, she sighed and looked up at him, those dark eyes stubbornly holding on to their secrets.

  “Someday you’ll have to tell me the real reasons you don’t want more, if not from me, then someone else. I won’t push for answers if you won’t push me.”

  Resting his hands lightly on her shoulders, he gave in to the urge to taste those sweet lips again, keeping it light and easy. “So, friends with no benefits. Deal?”

  She managed a small nod. “Deal.”

  Regret filled his chest that she accepted the bargain without putting up a bigger fight. Did he really want her to convince him that he was wrong to set limits? Maybe, but that just proved he was right to do so.

  He needed to release his hold on her, but his hands stubbornly remained right where they were. “So we’re good?”

  Amy’s palms settled against his chest, exactly where she’d feel the double-time pace his heart was doing right now. “We are.”

  “Okay, then.”

  Damn, this conversation was lame and going nowhere fast. Mikhail took a deep breath and forced himself to step back. Her hands fell away from his chest, taking their gentle warmth with them. “We should get back outside.”

  It seemed for a second she was going to say something else, something important. But then Amy shook her head and disappeared out the back door without another word. He almost called her back, wanting one last kiss before he had to share her company with the idiots out in the yard, but that would have defeated the purpose of the conversation they’d just had.

  At least pounding on nails would give him a safe target for his frustration. They only had two nail guns, but a hammer would serve his needs far better anyway. He’d burn up a lot more energy nailing up the boards with brute strength. One deep breath released part of his tension. A second took care of the rest, or at least enough of it. Hoping he looked more calm than he was, he headed out into the yard to join the others. He picked up the cooler and carried it over toward the property line where it would be easily accessible to everyone.

  Jay gave him an odd look as he walked by, but at least he didn’t say anything. Tino didn’t comment, either, when he headed over to the cooler to grab a can of pop. Amy had already set to work carrying boards to Jay. At least she was smiling. It didn’t look completely genuine to Mikhail, but maybe that was wishful thinking on his part. He had a sick feeling that he had just let something potentially really special slip through his fingers. It was unfair of him to want her to have regrets, too.

  Ricky made a beeline for the cooler. “Where’d you disappear to for so long? For a minute there, I thought maybe you’d pulled a Tom Sawyer and snookered us into building the fence while you hung out with Amy.”

  Mikhail automatically cuffed his nephew on the back of the head, even if his heart wasn’t really in it. But if he let a crack like that pass without retaliating, Tino and Jay would for sure know something was up. He’d told them he could use extra help because Amy might be getting her puppy sooner than expected. They’d accepted his excuse at face value, but they weren’t stupid. At the first scent that things weren’t exactly as he’d told them, they’d be all over him.

  Which reminded him, he hadn’t told Amy about the puppy thing.

  He carried a bottle of water over to where she stood by the pile of lumber. After unscrewing the top, he held it out. “There’s one thing I forgot to tell you.”

  She tipped her head a little to one side, a teasing glint in her eyes. “Besides the fact my puppy might arrive sooner than expected?”

  Well, crap. He’d deal with the fallout somehow. “No, that’s pretty much it.”

  “Good thing I told Ricky how excited I was about the little guy moving in with me. I did say there was only a small chance I could pick him up earlier than the breeder first told me. I even sounded really grateful that the three of them had given up their day to make the place safe for him.”

  “Thanks for not ratting me out to Tino. He would never let me forget it, and Ricky would tell Jack just so they could all gang up on me.” He grinned at her. “I could kiss you for saving me all that grief and misery, woman.”

  She arched one eyebrow. “Well, as nice as that would be, I think that’s what put us in this position in the first place.”

  Oh, right.

  “Guess I should get to work. With luck, we’ll finish up today. Once we get the boards up, Tino and I can install the gates.”

  “I can’t wait to see it all finished.”

  She started to walk away, but then she turned back. “Ricky mentioned something about pizza. Let me know when everyone starts getting hungry, and I’ll place the order.”

  He started to protest. After all, he’d been the one to call in the troops. But one look at the stubborn tilt to her chin, he surrendered without firing a single shot. “Fair enough.”

  With a quick nod, she walked away, her ponytail swinging in counterpoint to the sway of her hips. Damn. Suddenly, he sensed someone moving up behind him. Without hesitating, Mikhail spun to face the threat, ready to fight with his bare hands if necessary. Where the fuck was his weapon?

  “Steady there, big guy.”

  Gradually he realized it was Jay Tobin standing there, his hands held palms forward to show he was no threat. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to sneak up behind you like that. I sure as hell know better. We okay?”

  Mikhail jerked his head to acknowledge the peace offering. Right now he couldn’t draw enough breath to speak. He finally managed to force out his own apology. “My bad. Sorry.”

  “No problem.” Jay looked past Mikhail to where Amy was busy talking to Ricky and Tino. “I was just going to say you shouldn’t be looking at her like that if you don’t want Tino and Ricky picking up on how interested you are in your neighbor lady.”

  Well, damn, he was right. “Thanks. I didn’t realize it was so obvious.”

  “It probably wouldn’t be to people who didn’t know you well. Tino, though, will be all over it in a heartbeat.”

  Okay, now Mikhail was curious. He liked Jay just fine, but the man was actually more Tino’s friend than his. “And you know me that well?”

  The other man grinned. “No, but I know that look. It’s the same one Tino used to get on his face whenever he was thinking about Natalie, especially when they were on the outs.”

  There was more to the story than that. Mikhail studied the former Seal. “And what would you say if I asked if you’d ever sported the same expression yourself?”

  Jay’s gaze shifted to stare out toward the east as if he was seeing someplace—or someone—only he could sense. Then he shook his head and offered Mikhail a rueful smile. “I’d say that experience is the best teacher. Now, might I suggest we get back to work? We’re drawing unwanted attention from your nephew.”

  “Good answer. Remind me to buy you a beer the next time we end up in a bar together.”

  “I will.”

  Mikhail headed to the far corner where someone, most likely Amy, had piled a stack of lumber for him. He picked up the first board, lined it up with the fence post, and pounded in the first nail.

  One down, a shitload more to go. Just like all the endless days stretching out in front of him. Even if he’d thought there was a chance for him and Amy to be something more than neighbors, his overreaction to Jay’s approach only proved that he was right to be cautious. The ex-Seal could have handled himself if Mikhail hadn’t been able to pull himself back from the brink of violence.

 
But Amy, with her pretty eyes and sweet nature, wouldn’t have stood a chance. He positioned another nail and sank it deep into the wood. Gradually, he fell into a steady rhythm, and if the pounding silently echoed inside his head to the rhythm of “friends with no benefits,” well, that was his business and no one else’s.

  Chapter 7

  The fence looked good. Great even. Unfortunately, all that new lumber only made the rest of Mikhail’s yard look shabby. It also served as a solid, six-foot-tall barrier between his backyard and Amy’s, something else he didn’t like about it. It had been nearly a week since they’d last spoken, and he missed her company more than he wanted to admit even to himself.

  He’d wanted the fence finished to put some distance back between them, a decision he now regretted. Right now Amy was puttering around back there, but he had no idea what she was up to other than it involved a lot of frustrated muttering. From what he could tell, she’d been busy all week. Just yesterday, while he’d been at work, her front yard had suddenly sprouted a bunch of wooden stakes with string running between them.

  If he had to guess, she was getting ready to tear the hell out of the sod to make some new planting strips. After listening to make sure she was still in the backyard, he walked out to the street to study the results of her efforts. There was no telling what kind of plants she had in mind for the flower beds, but she definitely had an eye for how to make the most of the space.

  By comparison, his yard clearly sucked. Other than a couple of ragged rhododendrons under the front windows, all he had was grass liberally dotted with dandelions. Personally, he’d always thought the bright yellow flowers poking up through the grass were kind of pretty. Marlene, his adoptive mother, had never agreed with that assessment, and he doubted his neighbors would think that way, either, especially once the weeds went to seed. Guess he’d better make a stop at the garden store for some weed killer.

  He admired the new terra-cotta planters on either side of Amy’s front door. Maybe a similar pot or two of brightly colored flowers would improve the look of his own porch, but only if he could remember to keep them watered.